This is going to be a big, big week for me.
Like a really important week, and I’m terrified.
This week, I am expecting to get several college decisions back, and although there is nothing to be done now, I can’t help but worry. I have spent the last few days in a full blown ignorance is bliss mentality. I have been teetering between desperately wanting to know my future and hoping that I may never have to see the answer to my fate.
This may all sound horridly melodramatic- especially considering that I have already been accepted into one of my safety schools- but these decisions will decide where I spend the next four years of my life, and essentially how I will spend the rest of my life– ok I will admit it, that may be a bit too far, but you know what I mean!
The scariest part of the past few weeks was watching some of my brilliant friends get rejected from top tier schools. Some of the smartest people I know were deemed unfit to attend these institutions, and inevitably the little comparison voice in the back of my mind came out to play. All I can think is that if these extremely qualified students can’t get into the schools they like then where is the hope for me.
Wow. Even writing this makes me irrationally anxious.
This whole post came out far more pessimistic than I intended it to be, so I’ll end with the reasons that I am still relatively sane throughout this process:
  • You can kick ass no matter the college you go to.
    • The fact is that if you go to college and take advantage of the wonderful opportunity you have to receive higher education, you can do just about anything.  Having a top-tier diploma will not guarantee success, in the same way, that having a less well-known diploma will not guarantee failure– although failure is a relative term that is often arbitrary, but that is a conversation for another time.
  • There will always be a friend for you.
    • When you go to college everyone is looking for friends, and no one wants to be left in the dark. You aren’t alone, and if you put yourself out there you will find others who are willing to do the same.
  • Worst comes to worst, take a gap year or transfer next year.
    • Although this would infer with my perfectly laid out life plan, taking a gap year to find myself and what I want to do with my life doesn’t sound half bad.
What I’m trying to say is that it will all be okay, even when it doesn’t seem like it (cheesy  I know).
Love you alottle,
tori

 

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